Baffling Irony! In an Age of Female Empowerment, Porn Normalizes Rape and Sexual Abuse of Women

This is a guest post by Exodus Cry, an organization committed to abolishing sex trafficking and breaking the cycle of commercial sexual exploitation while assisting and empowering victims. You can read more about Exodus Cry and their mission at the bottom of this article.

As we celebrate Women’s History Month this March, it’s important to step back and examine the ironic cultural framework women are living in today. 

On one hand, we are in a time of huge progress for women in terms of women’s rights and female empowerment, where women are held in society as strong agents of change. Yet at the same time, extremely sexist, violent and degrading porn is being elevated and even praised as a healthy and normal thing to consume and participate in. 

We are simultaneously “fighting” assault while romanticizing and normalizing it.

In fact, there is a sentiment echoing throughout our culture that porn is somehow empowering for women. But just a quick visit to Pornhub proves otherwise, as video after video depicts violence and abuse aimed primarily at women. 

A woman in porn is neither given, nor viewed as worthy of, basic human dignity and respect; rather, she is objectified and used for man’s gratification. Porn desensitizes the user to her humanity. She is never referred to as a woman, but an array of derogatory names.

‍The idea that this is somehow empowering is the greatest lie porn is telling our culture. 

As of 2021, 84% of 14-18 year-old males and 57% of 14-18 year-old females have viewed pornography. That is a huge portion of our population whose framework for sex is being formed by porn. And we’re not talking about topless women in a magazine, we are talking about the most violent, aggressive, degrading porn imaginable. Its devastating influence is palpable. 

‍Related: Female Friendly Porn–What It Is and Why It’s Still Harmful

‍Porn leads to the real life exploitation and sexual abuse of women

Porn sets the precedent for how women are treated in the bedroom, and in relationships in general, and perpetuates the narrative that women enjoy being sexually dominated and abused. For young boys, this can become the foundation of their sexual understanding and shape what they act out in real life. 

Increased pornography consumption is linked to men’s enjoyment of degrading, uncommon, or aggressive sexual behaviors. In males as young as 14, a correlation was confirmed in several studies between frequent pornography viewing and an accepting stance toward raping a girl. 

Additionally, research for the BBC found that more than a third of UK women under the age of 40 have experienced unwanted slapping, choking, gagging or spitting during consensual sex. Why? Because this is how sex “should be” according to porn. 

This is further perpetuated by popular films like 50 Shades of Grey and 365 Days (an erotic kidnap film), both of which portray sexual violence, dominance, and submission as something the woman desires. 

It is no coincidence that as porn consumption increases, so have instances of sexual abuse and violence. 

According to a new report by the Center for Disease Control (CDC), one in 7 teenage girls said they have been raped. The number of teen girls who report having been forced to have sex has risen by 27 percent in the last 2 years. Violent porn is creating predators out of young men and exalting rape and abuse. 

To be clear, we know that not everyone who watches violent porn becomes a perpetrator of physical sexual abuse. However, studies show that most people who commit sexual abuse watch porn. And women are more often than not the subject of this violence. 

Related: Porn Harms Girls in 12 Ways: Fight Back with 3 Empowering Mindsets!

Porn is grooming women to accept abuse as normal 

What is even more concerning than the pervasiveness of violence towards women in porn, is women’s reactions to this violence. One study found that 95% of the targets of violence or aggression in porn appeared either neutral or appeared to respond with pleasure. 

The author of So Sexy So Soon, Jean Kilbourne, sums it up well when she says, “Most porn ends up with women being not only presented as the victims of violence, but often presented as the victims of violence who love it.”

In fact, porn is so effective at normalizing abuse that abusers use pornography to groom victims. 

A staggering 58% of female college students in the US have been choked during sex. But in most cases, they “consent” because they think it turns the guy on. In other words, women are being groomed to find this abuse and violence sexually pleasing or, at least, to act like it is. 

Sexual aggression is a reality women and girls have been conditioned to accept and even embrace the powerful messages being sent through mainstream media and our porn-saturated world. This is extremely evident on social media apps like TikTok, where girls as young as 12 are posting videos of themselves glorifying kinks such as being forcefully pushed up against a wall, choking, BDSM and even fantasies involving “knife play.” One video of a girl encouraging her reluctant boyfriend to choke her has 1.1 million views.

So girls are learning to be compliant and the most important thing is to be sexually desirable to men, even if that means putting themselves into harmful situations. 

Porn doesn’t empower women. It empowers their oppression.

Related: Fifty Shades of Abuse: 5 Lies Every Girl Needs to Recognize and Reject

We must reject porn’s narrative for women 

The porn industry exploits the injustices of sexual assault, abuse, and nonconsensual sexual encounters for entertainment and profit. Exploitation is not empowerment. We will never be able to stop the sexual exploitation of women and children if we do not shift the pornographic culture that fuels it.

Women are not represented by porn. Women are powerful, beautiful, influential members of society with their own real desires, needs, bodies, minds, and personalities who deserve respect and love. We ought to be celebrating and empowering this reality, not romanticizing a pornographic trope that reduces women to an object for men to violate.